I would blame it on my Javanese trait
To avoid confrontation at all costs.
To react even to disturbing news with a resigned smile and soft words.
Javanese who never give a direct refusal to any request but cluttered in giving and taking hints.
It was my mom who irately lectured me every morning saying that I would never get a job if I study politics in university.
It was my dad who squawked my supervisor, saying that he could pay me better than the company offered me as a news reporter.
I avoided the confrontation. I reacted with a resigned smile and soft words.
It took 12 years for my mom to understand that degree in social science can land me a range of employment offers. It took 5 years for my dad to recognize that journalism can give me more than 3 meals a day.
Yesterday, a scriptwriter lashed out at me for something she later called as a sum up of misinterpretation and miscommunication. Having my producer stands beside me is enough. “It is rubbish” said he, commenting on the scriptwriter’s e-mail, “I trust you more than her”.
I know it’s going to take some time for her to solve the misunderstanding puzzle and realize that she wouldn't need to be furious if only she had been willing to communicate trustfully and equally.
I avoided the confrontation. I reacted with resigned smile and soft words. Not only because of my Javanese trait, but also for believing that there are no perpetual enemies.



